Something’s Been Bothering Me
And it’s not the crank caller currently working in a FEMA Construction Zone in Louisiana who kept calling me yesterday afternoon to play clips from Napoleon Dynamite–no I’m not kidding. Dude…GET A LIFE!
My children are spoiled ungrateful brats. Now, don’t get me wrong, for the most part they’re good kids, though as most kids go, they’re inherrently selfish. Especially my oldest child. My youngest is the semi-oblivious one who’s so easy to buy for because he’s just happy to have something to open even if he does know who Santa is *ahem*
Anyway the kids had this whole “I’ll give you my first born child”–no THANK YOU–”for an x-box” discussion and I was like well, I’ll think about it. So in the mean time #1 badgers #2 into agreeing, despite #2’s worries that I might not get anything for christmas if I spent all my money on an X-box. *Sigh*
#1 says #2 can have the playstation in his room if he’ll agree, draws up a contract and they both sign it. So I had decided against it but I hadn’t told them yet, when this box of clothes I’d ordered (prior to the convo) shows up and #1 has a fit cuz he’s not getting an X-Box and I’m thinking,”You selfish little :hushup: . You have NO IDEA how lucky you are that you can’t remember the christmas’ I had to go to Salvation Army for presents, or how lucky you are to be warm and have your own room and have a freaking HOME and CLOTHES and SHOES you ungrateful, hateful, horrible little child.” And I turned around and looked at him and said, “If you say one freaking word, I’m taking all your presents back.”
Apparently I went seriously wrong somewhere. :embarassed:
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December 9th, 2005 at 5:35 pm
Hmm… tough one. I think all kids go through that one. And I think it is an insecurity issue. If they get gifts that they want (or think they want) then all is right with their world. If not, then someone’s about to lose a job or have to move. You know what I mean.
The keeping up w/ the Jones (though as much as I love Sandy I don’t see the big draw - inside joke m- sorry) plagues even children. They don’t want to be slighted and whatnot. Wish I had some sage advice. :zipit:
But I sometimes take perverse pleasure in telling the kids we’ll go to McDonald’s when I know they are in pissy moods and can’t not fight just so I can tell them *no* :wtf: - It’s a power thing!
December 9th, 2005 at 7:22 pm
no, you didn’t, Cece. Like you said, all kids go through *I’m the only one who matters* phrase.
December 9th, 2005 at 7:24 pm
oh, forgot to leave a hug (((hug))). I know how trying it can be, especially when they don’t have a clue about the sacrifices you’ve made so that they can take things for granted (including yourself. )
December 9th, 2005 at 7:48 pm
THanks ya’ll. You know at any given time ONE of them is driving me nuts but #1 is getting to that age. He’s just MEAN to his brother on top of rampant ingratitude.
You know I took #2 to the book fair today and bought him three books. Explained he couldn’t have all the books he wanted because of Christmas and his birthday (which he was fine with) and bought him three books (and me one LOL). The kid thanked me FOUR times for taking him and buying him new books. Now, lets just hope he doesnt change when he turns 12. :yell:
December 10th, 2005 at 2:17 pm
THEY are all like that. You know I bust my ass work 16 hour shifts because they have to have smack down 2006 and all this other BS…I am wearing two uniforms I wash everyday and shoes that hurt my feet…I love them but damnit I get selfish and think what the blank about me?
I know it’s a phaze, or at least I hope so. I went to get gifts for christmas for Church party. #3 throws a fit, “I hate you mom.” because I didnt buy him something…I can’t wait for them to have kids….LOL
December 10th, 2005 at 3:56 pm
You didn’t go wrong. Kids are kids and they all think they are the most important thing in the world. Hang in there. Stick to your guns. Someday, he’ll see just how ungrateful he really was. Besides, I don’t think kids should get everything they ask for anyway. There’s nothing wrong with saying no. NOTHING. {{HUGS}}
December 11th, 2005 at 1:32 pm
You didn’t go wrong–kids are just like that. I’m constantly reminding my son of how lucky he is–I didn’t have it NEARLY so good growing up. Sigh. I think that kids these days just don’t get it.
December 12th, 2005 at 3:56 pm
Sweetie, you are a great mom, and these are things kids just go through (and learn because of it). Don’t let them guilt trip you. :bleep: Mine survived those years - so will yours.
I remember the year I divorced his dad - spent everything I had to make sure he had all of the Star Wars toys I could get (can we say GUILT-ridden mom?), and when I walked in one day and found them littering the floor of his bedroom, parts missing, all I could see was (we won’t go into the dollar amount) $$$ spent that we could have used for necessities. It was also the year of the badly cooked Christmas dinner, which didn’t help. I was a mess that year.
NOW, years later, he thanks me for tough love that came after that one year - lol. But I so remember it and feel for you. It’s not worth the aggravation and worry to over-shoot your means, and it’s not great for the child to think the world is always fair and kind, baaaad as we hate those truths. :yell:
You hang in there. If you decide to go for X-Box, do so on your terms and pay without the guilt trip.
Love you!
December 13th, 2005 at 10:58 am
Awww Cece, kids are always ungrateful little shits.
But I’m with you, I would have wanted to kill him. I probably wouldn’t have handled it nearly as well as you did, because I would have told him he just kissed his chance at an xbox goodbye :zipit:
Hang in there, parenting is for the most part a thankless job!
December 13th, 2005 at 5:12 pm
:yelling: I agree, hon…today’s kids are SPOILED little shits! :yell: We caved and bought Tylar the motorcycle, but that is his ONLY gift from us. I am already anticipating the pouting and “is that all?” comments, which I hope-for his sake won’t come! :hushup: :moon:
December 14th, 2005 at 8:10 am
I agree with what everyone else has said. Kids are kids and they start out a bit selfish. I consider part of my job to make them think about other people. Lol and it’s a long time coming.
December 14th, 2005 at 11:53 am
Agree with all previous comments.
The thing is that we love our children, and want their lives to be better than ours was. We also protect them from some of the harsher realities of life–struggle, work, sacrifice–so they really have no sense of what it takes to achieve that goal.
I remember seeing a very old photo, a reprint from a Look or Life magazine of the war years. It showed a European child, big eyes, ill-fitting clothes.
And the photographer caught him at a moment when he’d just opened a box. A box of brand-new shoes, the first he’d ever had in his life. He was hugging those shoes to his heart with an expression of the most sublime, ecstatic happiness I’d ever seen on a human face.
I always remember that photo at this time of the year.
December 15th, 2005 at 1:02 pm
Cece, keep in mind their frae of reference. Kids don’t have to worry about anyone (including themselves). They have no idea what you go through just supplying the basics. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t the same as a child. But I grew out of it, and if it makes you feel better, I now have a great amount of guilt b/c of it. When my mom got laid off, I started making her mortgage payments for her, I figured I owed her that much. So rest easy…… or just give the kids away as Xmas presents to people you don’t like:crazy:. Either works.
Os